As I said last week, the great, inevitable winter downturn in form continues on and on through the shitty weather and cramped fixture schedules of January and February - and now even has an added sprinkle of further uncertainty and confusion from the mid-season transfer window. In a season of almost nothing but awful gameweeks, this one looks like it could be competing to become the worst of the worst. Almost everyone looks leggy and jaded, form is all over the place. Fulham losing to Leeds and Spurs losing (at home!) to West Ham were perhaps not entirely surprising, but United winning so comfortably against a lacklustre City was, and Sunderland beating Palace and Arsenal and Liverpool being held to draws by bottom-of-the-table sides were even more so.
A few surprises in Michael Carrick's first selection, with Dorgu being retained as an attacking player (though back on the left, rather than the right - where he had unexpectedly thrived in a couple of experimental run-outs under the the last days of Ruben Amorim), Shaw and Maguire coming back into the back-four (at the expense of Leny Yoro) alongside Martinez and Dalot, Sesko being dropped at centre-forward in favour of just-back-from AFCON Mbeumo, and Mainoo slotting in alongside Casemiro in the midfield engine-room (that one not so surprising - although he looked just a little ring-rusty, after being frozen out of competitive football for so long, his swift turns away from a pressing opponent were as useful as ever). Pep dropped Cherki for Semenyo, but the new boy struggled to make any impact in this one; and Matheus Nunes had apparently gone down with 'flu, so Rico Lewis had to deputise for him at right-back. It was one of the most entertaining lunchtime games we've seen this season, although it threatened for quite a while to be a thrilling nil-nil: both teams playing some slick football and progressing the ball quickly, but struggling to find the necessary incisveness when they got near the opposition penalty box. United, however, were having all the most dangerous moments: Donnarumma came out like a thunderbolt to clear Alleyne's weak back-pass off the toes of Dorgu and Mbeumo early on, made good saves from Dorgu and Diallo (and another save from Diallo at the beginning of the second-half, followed by a double-block on Casemiro's attempt to follow up), saw Maguire smash a close-range header from a corner against the cross-bar just a few minutes in, and was relieved that quick breaks in behind from Amad Diallo and Bruno Fernandes - who were both able to get round him rather easily and coolly slot home into an empty net - were shown a late flag for tight-ish offsides (Amad's looked like a matter of only 6 or 8 inches, Bruno's more like 18 inches or so); another moment of panic was uncannily redeemed by super-fast reactions from Khusanov to steal the ball off Mbeumo when a misplaced pass on the edge of the City box had gifted the ball to Bruno who was able to square it to his striker in acres of space. Pep made the harsh decision to sub young Max Alleyne at half-time (shunting Ake into central defence from the left and restoring Nico O'Reilly to the left-back slot), but that did nothing to stop the rot, and it began to seem inevitable that United would eventually find a breakthrough - as they eventually did with a lightning three-man counter-attack confidently finished by Mbeumo. Cunha, brought on to replace Mbeumo after 70 minutes, also looked lively in his cameo, and set up Dorgu for a second after just a few minutes on the pitch; and shortly afterwards another fast break from Diallo - on the left this time! - ended with him lashing a shot against the post. Late substitute Mason Mount appeared to have made the margin even more decisive in added-on time, but a long VAR check eventually decided that Cunha had been very narrowly offside when running on to the initial through-ball. City, somehow, were misfiring in almost every single aspect of their game here (well, apart from the goalkeeping), and were really pretty fortunate not to go down 5-0. United fans are justifiably ecstatic - though they'll probably now be questioning even more why they didn't ditch Amorim last summer. City fans might perhaps console themselves with the 'what if' that the game might have turned out very differently if Dalot had been sent off, as he really should have been in the opening minutes, when his clumsy follow-through on Doku raked studs down the side of the winger's knee with sufficient force to bend his leg dangerously inwards - very lucky to inflict only a painful bruise rather than season-ending ligament damage.
Chelsea were able to field their 'best 11' for the first time in a while (although Palmer still looked somewhat short of full match fitness, and was completely drained by the end), but still their ultimately quite comfortable win was a little bit of a surprise, given the strength of Brentford's recent form. Somehow, though, the visitors didn't bring their best game this time, and despite having a slight majority of possession, they couldn't do much with it; all their best chances fell to Schade rather than Thiago, and the German just hadn't brought his scoring boots with him. Chelsea should also have had a penalty early on, when a defender clipped Joao Pedro's heel in the box; not a very strong contact, but completely clearcut - Pedro's rather theatrical dive probably worked against him (well, that and the fact that Chelsea just never get penalties any more!.... although they did in fact get a rare award here in the second-half, comfortably despatched by Palmer). At least VAR was doing its job for once, correcting the linesman's rash decision that Joao Pedro had been offside for his well-taken opening goal (it was tight, but he was pretty clearly onside, even to the naked eye). Chelsea weren't really all that good, but they were good enough to prevail over a misfiring opponent.
Liverpool v Burnley started out a fairly drab and scrappy affair, but slowly warmed up. Gakpo earned possibly the softest penalty of the year so far by walking into a Burnley defender and falling over. Szoboszlai, now claiming the penalty duties (why is not Ekitike??), was perhaps so embarrassed by this decision that he smashed his spot-kick against the cross-bar. Liverpool started to get on top after this, and Florian Wirtz ended up having his best league game for the club yet - smashing in a goal very emphatically from 15 yards out, having another decent effort soon after, and playing in Gakpo for an attempt that had to be cleared off the line by Humphreys. Burnley, though, kept plugging away, and their excellent winner from winger Marcus Edwards felt well-deserved. Indeed, they might have snuck away with a win if Konate's latest lapse had proven costly: shortly before the Burnley goal, the increasingly clumsy-looking defender had prodded a low cross from Edwards powerfully towards his own goal - demanding an outstanding save from Alisson to preserve the tenuous lead. Liverpool piled on the pressure over the last 20 or 30 minutes, but couldn't break their obstinate visitors down - although Ekitike had an apparent late winner rightly ruled out for offside (and a possible handball too), and then somehow failed to get a touch when unmarked at the far post as Curtis Jones's fiercely driven square ball (mishit shot??) whizzed past the end of his toe.
Lucas Perri was replaced in goal by Karl Darlow, after a few shakey performances of late. Daniel Farke might have wished he could replace his whole team, as this game against Fulham was a dour, lifeless encounter that had 0-0 written all over it from the outset. The recently on-fire Brenden Aaronson and Harry Wilson had the only two decent half-chances in the match, but both failed to get their efforts on target. A late breakaway by Ampadu down the right set up substitute Nmecha for a superb goal just as we entered stoppage time at the end of the game; and the German forward nearly made it a brace a minute or two later, when his fierce shot after a solo break down the left brought an excellent save out of Leno.
Mavropanos, who looked as if he had suffered a serious head and/or neck injury in the FA Cup last week, was fit to start after all, and produced a very good looping header that forced Vicario into a flying save in the first-half. Spurs suffered another injury blow when Ben Davies had to leave the pitch with a serious leg injury after just a quarter of an hour, while new signing Conor Gallagher made an immediate start, but failed to have much of an impact - in a game which West Ham were able to dominate for long periods. The home side came out with much more cohesion and purpose in the second-half, and were able to get back on terms through a powerful Romero header. Indeed, they looked like they should have been able to take charge of the game, with Areola being forced into saves from powerful efforts by Bissouma and Simons; and they feel they might have had a penalty when the ball touched Scarles's hand (I don't know how the no-penalty decision was justified under the current labyrinthine guidelines, but it seemed fair enough to me: the ball barely brushed his fingertips, and he knew absolutely nothing about it as the ball was played on to him by the Spurs player from only inches away). But flapper Vicario yet again allowed himself to get boxed in at a corner, and substitute Callum Wilson was able to lash home an injury-time winner. Another disastrous home result had the fans baying for Thomas Frank's dismissal at the final whistle, and I fear his position at the club has surely now become untenable.
Sunderland were re-energized by the return of Sadiki and Reinildo from AFCON, but visiting Palace still had the better of first phase of the game - not notably discombobulated by the sudden loss of Marc Guehi or by Oliver Glasner's shock announcement on Friday of his intention to leave the club at the end of the season. Unfortunately, Yeremy Pino's neat opening goal was almost immediately cancelled out by Le Fee, and in the second-half the home team increasingly asserted themselves until another goal became inevitable; indeed, they really should have had a penalty when Romaine Mundle was barged in the back by Justin Devenny. Adam Wharton might have been a bit lucky to escape a second yellow card as well. Unfortunately, the game itself was soon overshadowed by Glasner's glum comments afterwards, complaining at feeling his team has been "abandoned" by the club's ownership (he seemed especially aggrieved at the failure to at least hang on to Eze and Guehi a bit longer, to try to delay their transfers to squeeze one or two more games out of them, but that's probably not a realistic demand; his bigger gripe is surely the failure to promptly bring in adequate replacements, which left him with a threadbare bench this week). This surely signals that he'll depart the club this week rather than at season's end - an unfortunate loss to the English game (unless he perhaps takes the Spurs job??).
Accumulating defensive injuries at Arsenal have finally given Ben White a route back to the starting place that was his right a couple of seasons ago - but for how long? Arteta also brought in Martinelli (who put the only decent chance of the first-half agonisingly just an inch or two wide of the far post) for the recently prolific Trossard (but swapped them back at half-time, which can't be likely to boost the confidence of either player), and - a rare occurrence indeed! - rested Saka (no doubt to the chagrin of many FPL managers, quite a few of whom might have made him captain for this fixture) in favour of Madueke, while giving the seemingly 'out of favour' Eze a scant 10 minutes at the end. Saka and Merino, though, got on for the last half-hour or so (at the expense of Madueke and Gyokeres, denied full appearance points), and Saka produced the best effort of the game - a towering header that brought a flying fingertip save from Sels. Forest, much improved on recent lifeless performances, had the best of the game for the most part, and did a good job of frustrating their visitors - who may have been feeling a bit of extra pressure from the fact that they unexpectedly had a chance to extend their lead in the title race. A mostly rather dull and uneventful match was distinguished by the oddity of having 2 dubiously turned-down penalties: Hudson-Odoi was pulled/tripped by Timber on the edge of the area, but both the referee and the VAR team somehow concluded that the 'decisive moment' of the illegal contact had occurred a fraction of an inch short of the line (I think absolutely everyone in the stadium, including the Arsenal fans, must have thought it was a penalty!); but then the balance of injustice was perhaps restored later in the game when Aina clearly handled the ball in an attempt to keep it in play, but this was somehow excused on the 'natural position for the arm' clause (oh yes, if you're trying to keep the ball from crossing the line, you naturally move the crook of your elbow towards it!).
In a gameweek of almost entirely limp matches, Wolves v Newcastle was undoubtedly the limpest. Usually 0-0s result from sterling defensive performances, but here neither keeper earned 'saves' points, and only Mosquera earned 'defensive points' (no-one else came anywhere near). The only decent effort in the game came from Wolves's explosive teenager Mateus Mané, whose cute over-the-shoulder volley from 10 yards out unfortunately went straight down the middle into Pope's arms. Newcastle were fortunate that Trippier and Botman were fit again to plug the gaps in their defence, and Trippier might have been 'Man of the Match' - curling a free-kick into the outside of the side-netting, and putting in a sublime cross early in the game that Woltemade somehow failed to make contact with. (And he was playing through some discomfort, as Mané had accidentally stamped on his forehead early on, leaving him with a deep cut across the bridge of his nose.) Woltemade, Tonali, and Gordon were all taken off in the 65th minute: reasonable enough, since they weren't having much impact in this stalemate of a game - and at least they got their minimum FPL 'appearance points' from the outing. The main takeaway from this one is that Rob Edwards has finally got Wolves playing like a side who don't deserve to go down: they're still a long way from great, but at least they're now showing some confidence and cohesion, and are becoming tougher to beat.
Of all the slumps in form we've seen this week, Villa's was perhaps the most dramatic and alarming. They dominated possession against visitors Everton, but really weren't able to do anything much with the ball. All the best chances fell to Morgan Rogers, who managed to miss them all badly (apart from one good curled effort from distance near the end, which might have been just sneaking under the bar, until Pickford flew across his goal to tip it over). Their closest chance was actually a miscued header from Guessand which deceived Pickford and looped on to the face of the crossbar behind him. Ollie Watkins was so anonymous in this game that I had to double-check the match reports to see if he'd even been playing: absolutely zero mentions in the commentary, and just about zero touches of the ball! Villa also lost the inspirational John McGinn, who limped off the pitch early on with what looked like it might be a knee-cartilage problem. And in a mostly fairly glum, uneventful match where neither side created much scoring threat, they managed to give a goal away with a dreadful double error: Pau Torres's miscontrol giving the ball away just outside his own box, and then Martinez spilling Dwight McNeil's weak curled effort right at the feet of a surprised and grateful Thierno Barry. Jake O'Brien had also headed home from a short-corner routine, but Harrison Armstrong was adjudged to have been offside at the edge of the six-yard box as Garner played the ball in. (This again was a rather unsatisfying decision. The TV picture kept freezing the frame as Garner was beginning to swing his foot at the ball. At this point, Armstrong was clearly a foot or so behind the line of the defenders - but he was already stepping back towards an onside postion as the defenders were quckly dropping deeper, so their relative positions changed dramatically within one or two tenths of a second. And it really wasn't clear when Garner's foot had made contact with the ball... or when that contact finished, as he was playing a gentle scooped cross with a fairly prolonged contact on the ball: this was actually a very, very tight decision, and a few frames of the video playback could have made all the difference. It would have been reassuring to see an official SAOT graphic to justify this call - since this technology can supposedly identify the 'exact' moment a pass is struck via a sensor inside the ball - but none was forthcoming.) And the visitors had come close to nicking what might have been one of the three or four fastest goals in Premier League history when a long-ball from Pickford reached baby-faced midfielder Merlin Röhl who cracked off an early shot from the edge of the box; he didn't make particularly good contact with it, but it caught Martinez by surprise and eluded his dive, rolling against the foot of the far post... just under 11 seconds from the opening whistle. (It would have been nice to see that go in, just for the little bit of history.)
Monday night's south coast derby between Brighton and Bournemouth might have been the most entertaining fixture of the gameweek - although that's not saying much. Brighton had 'rested' three of their most crucial players, Baleba, Rutter, and Minteh, and although making a lively and dangerous start to the game, soon allowed their visitors to start taking control. Adli's fall in the penalty area at the end of a swift break led by Tavernier was initially judged a 'dive' by Paul Tierney, but for once VAR proved useful in showing that Verbruggen had indeed touched his feet as he grasped vainly for the ball. It's interesting to see that after Semenyo's departure and Kluivert's injury, Tavernier is now on penalty-taking duties, and looking very confident in the role. Bournemouth were then all over the home side for the last part of the first-half, with Evanilson beating Verbruggen with a neat dink but seeing the ball come back off the inside of the far post, and then putting a header inches wide. Brighton reasserted control in the second-half, however, and began looking particularly dangerous after the belated introduction of their three star performers in the 66th minute. However, a resolute Bournemouth managed to defy them until teen substitute Kostoulous came up with a bicycle-kick goal at the beginning of added-on time. A good game - apparently unmarred by refereeing cock-ups (almost unique this gameweek).
Yes, once again it's a super-weird FPL 'Team of the Week'; of the preliminary line-up after Saturday's matches only Bruno Fernandes, Dorgu and Chalobah had much of an FPL ownership (and the latter two not that much); the only subsequent change was that Chalobah got bumped out by Thiaw. There was a dearth of goals (the 10th lowest-scoring gameweek in Premier League history!), almost all of the most fancied FPL players came up blank, and pretty nearly all of the results confounded expectations. In a season of miserably low gameweek averages this week's figure of 40 points is almost a new nadir! Also, there were 5 penalties probably wrongly not given (2 in the same game!), and 1 wrongly given (and missed!), a couple of red cards missed, a slightly dubious disallowed 'offside' goal for Everton, and a fair old welter of near-misses and efforts against the woodwork; also some unwelcome selection surprises, and generally sub-standard performances from almost everyone - this is again looking like about an 8 out of 10 on the 'Luck-o-Meter' for this gameweek.